Commitment

This is such a powerful word, and if used correctly can move a mountain. I have said time and time again I am committed to myself, my health, and my weight loss, but I start over and over and over all the time. I know the skinny girl is in there. I know she is ready to come out and play. She has been hidden for so long and I think I had gotten to the point where I really didn't know how to release her. I buried her when I buried my feelings.

I haven't always been this way. When I was younger, I got something from food. I got comfort and joy. Now I get cellulite, and fat! When I was younger it got me attention, cause folks would be like, you can eat all that, or that lil girl is going to eat all that. It was almost like I had achieve something. Now I know I can't eat all that, but still try to, and sweets, boy o boy, sweets are my best friend!

Which leads me to commitment. I once was committed to how I looked and making sure I didn't go over a certain weight. So now I need to recommit myself. God help me to find my commitment again!